Category Archives: Uncategorized

Appropriate yet inappropriate photos 2.0


Back by popular demand! Requested by the masses! The incredible block busting post “Appropriate yet inappropriate photos” is back! new and improved and better then ever! Ha, Ha I’m just stupid and childish and now and then I like to escape the serious world and just have a laugh. Version 2.0 has the same ground rules, read on and give us the FUNNY….. Go see the original post here for some inspiration https://breakitdownpete.wordpress.com/2012/04/22/appropriate-yet-inappropriate-photos/

Appropriate for my site yes! For my usual readership, hell Yes! For other stick up the ass, bouche, condescending sites whose readers have the attention span of a gerbil, the sense of humor of a comma patient – Maybe not so much! I have decided that this week I am going to just let my hair down and have some fun with some sexy photo campaigns from ad agencies from around the world. Like they say Sex sells. These are ads that push the inappropriate line of sex innuendos to sell a product or idea. I am going to give you some of my own twisted, seriously inappropriate captions and you see if you can add an even better caption then mine in your comments! Come on now, my usual suspects. Dont let me down I know how funny and dirty you guys can get! come get some! Dont make me call you out by name! Stoopidhousewifes, Lafemmeroar, Lizziecracked, Lorna, J.a.m, Guapo, Ohmar, Cayman, Linda, Lorrelee…………..I will copy some of your captions into my post next to my captions so they show up on the post and we can compare, funny for funny and dirty for dirty.

BIDPETE: Not tonight honey I have a headache (this is an ad for a jeans company)

EL Guapo: Honey,does all the heroin I shot make my ass look fat?

BIDPETE: This is why women don’t like to walk their dogs (like you ladies say all men are dogs)

EL Guapo: Not all undergarments can hide unsightly growths.

BIDPETE: Girl friend I wish I could find a good man like you have? Hold on I will shit you another one!

The original caption is a great one (becoming a donor is probably your only chance to get inside her)

EL Guapo: I always dress like this when I know BIDPete is watching!

BIDPETE: Dental work will be required.

EL Guapo: WOW! I never get anything this meaty at home!

BIDPETE: Viagra’s version of dick in a box. (this is an ad for Viagra)

BIDPETE: New and improved suck popsicles from pfizer pharmaceuticals

BIDPETE: Damn! now you tell me how easy it was not to get busted. (this is an ad for post it notes)

EL Guapo: Bill finally found a way to save himeslf from the “morning-after-embarassment” of one night stands.

 

BIDPETE: I got one word for you honey WAX. (this is an ad for a female tightening cream)

EL Guapo: (No. No way in hell I’m writing what I just thought of.)

BIDPETE: O.M.G. I’m scared of this woman! (look close there should be 5 pillars) Damn!! she will need a 5 gallon pail of the tightening cream from the above photo…(this is an ad for a female lubricant) I can’t help it this is some seriously funny shit.

EL Guapo: We warm our seats the old fashioned way.

BIDPETE: Dude how was your date last night? It was great! You wanna smell my pillar!

BIDPETE:  Is it time to play hide and seek again

Please, Please, Please no hate emails! If you are new to my site, read https://breakitdownpete.wordpress.com/2011/06/04/because-you-are-a-bitch/ https://breakitdownpete.wordpress.com/2010/12/05/what-you-think-your-a-man/ https://breakitdownpete.wordpress.com/2012/02/14/i-dont-love-my-wife-2/ https://breakitdownpete.wordpress.com/2012/06/11/father-is-what-i-am-2/ ABOUT ME and MY GOAL before you tell me about how this is degrading to women. And you will see that I am PRO WOMEN. I know all of these show women in not the best light. I did not take the pictures I am just having some fun and a few laughs with them. So here is one about men.

This is an ad for a gay bar.

EL Guapo: The Catholic Seminary Soccer Team wants YOU!

Cayman: If not for the uni’s in that team photo, I’d have sworn it was the Red Sox.

BIDPETE: Penn state alumni meeting
BIDPETE: Pennsylvania Breaking news! Six men shot in the face.

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Filed under Current events, Life, Marriage, Sexy, Uncategorized

Christmas


MERRY CHRISTMAS! MY FRIENDS! OR HAPPY HOLIDAYS! OR JUST HAPPY SUNDAY! DID I COVER EVERYBODY? OOOOPS FORGOT ONE, MERRY CHRISTMAS HATERS!!

20111224-212725.jpg

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Pistol-whipping the attendant


So the gas station down the street just finished raping you when you filled your gas tank and you are pissed. You thought about pistol-whipping the attendant and taking your money back because now you are a broke ass bitch. Then you thought about having to spend the next year in jail and you realised that you are not only a broke ass bitch but also a pussy. So you came to your senses, drove home, sat down and decided that you are going to stick it to the life sucking oil companies. And purchase a HYBRID. Well i am here to tell you that if you do purchase a hybrid you are not only all the things you thought about yourself above but now you are also a dumb ass bitch. Read the article below and look at the research do the numbers and don’t fall for the hype.

http://www.edmunds.com/fuel-economy/edmunds-study-do-hybrids-make-financial-sense-yet.html

Year/Make/Model Years to Break Even
15,000 miles/year 25,000 miles/year
2009 Saturn Vue vs.  2009 Saturn Vue Hybrid 12.8 7.7
2009 Ford Escape XLT vs. 2009 Ford Escape Hybrid 10.2 6.8
2009 Chevy Malibu vs.2009 Chevy Malibu Hybrid 15.1 9.1
2009 Honda Civic EX vs.   2009 Honda Civic Hybrid 13.9 8.3
2009 Chrysler Aspen vs. 2009 Chrysler Aspen Hybrid 5.5 3.3
2009 Toyota Corolla LE vs.   2009 Toyota Prius 16.2 9.7
2009 Toyota Camry LE vs.   2009 Toyota Prius 4.2 2.5
2009 GMC Yukon vs.  2009 GMC Yukon Hybrid 10.1 6.0
2009 Toyota Camry XLE vs. 2009 Toyota Camry Hybrid 6.5 3.9
2009 Nissan Altima vs.  2009 Nissan Altima Hybrid 15.6 9.4
2008 Lexus GS 430 vs.  2008 Lexus GS 450h 18.6 11.2
2008 Toyota Highlander Limited vs.  2008 Toyota Highlander Hybrid Limited 25.3 15.2
2008 Lexus RX 350 vs.  2008 Lexus RX 400h 13.1 7.9

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Filed under Current events, Financial opinons, Life, Uncategorized

W.T.F. a fourth bureau?


STOP!  PAY ATTENTION!  This is some serious shit that i am about to drop in your lap. I’m going to give you a few minutes to put the kids to bed, turn off the T.V. get your glasses and a pen and paper. Well are you ready? Let’s focus… This is a preliminary post with more to follow as i continue to research this craziness. Any finance or accounting  pros out there please help us out with any info you can share. We all know about the 3 major credit bureaus, Equifax, Trans union, Experian. But you might not know that there are other CLANDESTINE companies who track the rest of your life.(collectively they are known as the FOURTH BUREAU). These companies sell that information to lenders, landlords, employers and even health care providers with out your knowledge or consent. These companies gather data from sources as varied as payday loans, magazine subscriptions, cable subscriptions, utility bills, auto warranties, also purchases of prepaid cards, visits to payday lenders, plus rent-to-own furniture stores, gym memberships, rent payments and cell phone bills. WAIT a f*****g new york minute. Are you listening to the words that are coming out of my mouth. These companies know whether your checks have cleared. WHAT! and they scour public records for mentions of your name. SON-OF-A-BITCH this pisses me off!  These companies unfairly use your data to draw potentially harmful and unreliable conclusions about your credit worthiness and your ability to pay.  Five – facts about the fourth bureau: (One). The fourth bureau collects what the big three don’t. There is no industry standard for the type of data that can be used in the fourth bureau. (Two.) 30-70 million U.S. consumers or more do not show up in the big three or have thin credit histories. Ahhhhh let’s think about this for a minute, i wonder who these people could be that are being targeted by these mother f******g vultures. Come on you have been following my blog for a while you know this answer come on its easy. IT’S THE YOUNG STUDENTS, IMMIGRANTS, MINORITIES OR LOW – INCOME CONSUMERS. Surprise, Surprise. (Three.) Fourth bureau data can help you qualify for a loan or better rate – or NOT. For consumers outside the big three, the data in the fourth bureau can help them establish a track record that proves they are financially responsible. Showing that you’ve paid other bills on time may help persuade banks to lend you money. But not all of them are willing to accept the data in place of a traditional credit history. On the other hand, if you have been late on your bills, it may come back to haunt you even if your record at the big three is clean. (four.) You may be charged a fee to look at your records. You can be charged as much as $11.00 for your file. However, anyone who hs been denied credit or gotten a bad interest rate  can get one free report . (five.) No one knows how accurate the reports are.
Federal regulations do not always require companies to disclose when they share your financial history or with whom, and there is no way to opt out when they do. No standards exists for what types of data should be included in the fourth bureau or how it should be used. No one is even tracking the accuracy of these reports. That has created a virtually impenetrable system n which consumers, particularly the most vulnerable, have little insight into the forces shaping their financial futures.
Now it’s your turn – comment ,offer some advise, provide some research, MAKE SOME NOISE DAMN IT!

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Free credit score my ASS!


Why do i even have to speak about this topic? Companies such as free credit score .com basically act as an agent for a fee. They attempt to get you hooked into a membership by offering free trial periods. usually a 7 day free trial period. Lets use free credit score .com as an example.  free credit score REQUIRES you to enroll in their triple advantage program (Here is the A- HA moment. If you now go to the www.experian.com site you will see that the triple advantage program is the same program that is offered by Experian. Are you starting to understand that with this blog i am trying to teach you how to look past the sales pitch). That after your 7 day free trial period if you do not cancel within those 7 days will automatically start billing you $14.95 a month. You can cancel your membership at any time BUT YOUR FEES ARE NON REFUNDABLE. Now let’s go to their frequently asked questions page where you will find some interesting facts and extras. They only offer the Experian credit score. But for an ADDITIONAL one time fee they will order  you the credit report from the other two credit bureaus. (that sucks because you should get all 3 credit reports as some times they differ from each other) they offer card safe service for an ADDITIONAL $19.95 annual fee. Child secure service for an ADDITIONAL $6.95 monthly fee. Which requires card safe for $6.95 monthly fee. Go to their site and read the rest for yourself. A few things i want to point out. Why in the world would anybody want to use a service like this, when you can go direct to the source (Equifax,Experian,Transunion) who already have most of your private and sensitive information and offer most of the same extra services. When you use free credit score .com they keep and store all your private and sensitive information. When you use their card safe service they keep and log all of your credit card information.(are you serious you worry about using your card at retail stores, but now you want to give access to your most private information and credit card numbers to a company based in san francisco but registered in Delaware). The credit score calculation that they call your plus score is just the standard calculation offered by Experian. They say things like, as a member you will ENJOY the following benefits like $50,000 product guarantee (yea but not in New York) I don’t know about you but i ENJOY things like a good restaurant, a base-ball game, sex, etc. I don’t know if i will ENJOY third-party sales offers, pop ups, or solicitations, or benefits at extra ADDITIONAL fees.We take privacy and security very seriously (i hope so, but what those that mean to me) all your information that they collect remains in their system. BOTTOM line you can get a free credit report from ALL 3 CREDIT BUREAUS AT www.annualcreditreport.com and if you want any of the extra options offered by free credit report .com you can get them directly from the 3 credit bureaus who ALREADY HAVE YOUR SENSITIVE information. Instead of having your information in the hands of some third-party company somewhere out-of-state. Come on people wake up. You should NEVER use companies like these that offer free credit reports, there are tons of them out there. Or who offer to repair your credit score (They CAN NOT) Instead go directly to the credit bureus. www.experian.com, www.transunion.com, www.equifax.com Its easy for you to do it yourself, but it does require you to do some work. Stop being lazy! Also go to www.ftc.gov

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Filed under Current events, Financial opinons, Life, Uncategorized

“WHAT” YOU THINK YOU’RE A MAN


Because you come from the hood, you ride or die with your crew, you make it rain, you pop bottles, you have ladies in many zip codes, you push a hot whip? Let me break it down. Any body can knock out any body. That does not make you a man it only makes you bigger, stronger, faster than the other guy. You have a couple of “girl friends” That makes you a womanizer, and abuser, a liar, a phony to the women who think they care about you. You make it “rain”. You “pop bottles” That makes you a financial moron! Spending $350.00 in a club for a $37.00 bottle of vodka . Now let me give you my definition of a man. A man loves and respects his wife/women, loves and protects, educates, and nurtures his children. He does what ever it takes to support his family by educating himself,  seeking to move up and get promotions in his job or working 2,or 3 jobs if he needs to. Not buying that whip if he can not comfortably afford it. A man is the one who has $10.00 left in his pocket and needs to get to work but does not have enough gas in his car, he knows his baby needs milk/diapers so he spends the money on his child and forgets about the gas, Instead he gets up extra early and takes the bus/train to get to work. He does not make excuses for his situation, instead he works to improve it. He embraces his position as the man of the house, does not disrespect his spouse/girlfriend, does not physically or mentally abuse her. Instead he encourages and embraces her and appreciates her contributions to the relationship. This is my definition of a man. So look in the mirror,. Challenge yourself, Believe in yourself and be a MAN……

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Filed under Life, Marriage, Parenting, Uncategorized

Hello world!


Welcome to Break it down pete Blog. Lets make this thing happen! Start with the about me section then my goal so you can understand what I am trying to accomplish with this blog.

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