Yea you heard me I called them COW-GIRLS!  My main man, the comeback kid, the best 4th quarter touch down throwing of all time with 15 count them 15- 4th quarter touch down passes. Cool as ice, my quarter back is better than your quarter back  ELI the magician Manning Bitch slapped your Tony Simpson oops I mean Romo upside the head and did not get a roughing the quarter back penalty because I told you he is a magician! ohhhh how sweet it is to go into a stadium with 100,000 fans in attendance and the home team is ahead of you, all cocky and knowing that if they beat you, you are out of the playoffs and instead with 5 or so minutes to go in the game and you are down by 12 points you pull down their pants to expose them as little school girls then leave them sniffling in the post game press conference. Oh I love this time of the year and my BIG BLUE MACHINE! Let me break down the last few minutes of the game for you as I saw it! The ice man Eli drives the GIANTS down the field, eats up the clock before giving the ball to Jacobs who plows thru the Cow Girls defensive line like he owns them, like they owe him money, like they are a rented mule. For a TOUCH DOWN! Now because we are the beast from the east we then shove a 2 point conversion down their throats to go up by a field goal. Now to really mess with their sniffling fans we let them come down the field to within field goal range. Where we act like school yard bullies and call a time out just as bailey kicks a good field goal, but because we called a time out before the snap it is called back. Now during the time out Baily is so scared the he shits in his pants and that load of shit in his pants shifts his weight causing him to kick the next attempt low where my main man Pierre blocks it and sends the fan home crying in their beer! Yea boy! Come on Cow girl fans bring it don’t let me talk shit to myself!!!


Filed under Current events, Life, Sports stories

12 responses to “G-MEN Bitch Slap COW-GIRLS!

  1. Eli’s fourth quarter prowess really isn’t hard to figure. The one defining quality of this kid coming out of Ole Miss was that he didn’t shrink in the big moments. The Giants need to shore up that D, but Eli makes them an intriguing team should they make the postseason.

  2. Becoming Bitter

    Hey Grandpa Pete! Not a sports fan and I’ve been a busy bee. So much work to do with the holidays around the corner. < That's it for the update on my life. So tired. Anyways, I hope you enjoy your winter/Christmas holidays.

  3. I love reading your blog and that you like my blog too, so… nominated you for the Versatile Blog Award. Please follow this link: http://narcissistsblog.wordpress.com/2011/12/14/versatile-blogger-award-i-feel-so-loved/ for rules and share some love with other bloggers. Best Wishes – Teri

  4. COW GIRLS now that is funny shit! I dont care who you are. Oh wait if you are a fan of the pansy asses maybe not huh? – gee Pete I don’t see em comin out of the woodwork to challenge your hilarious and entertaining (as usual) commentary…….I’m a Bronco fan first a Steeler fan second – or is it the other way around? Yea I know but I’m a girl so I can have 2 – not A COW GIRL tho !!
    Oh I forgot 3rd would be any team that sends Dallas to the losing side! YES!! Oh except I hate the Raiders too. I’ll stop 😉
    Peace 🙂

    • Look at you woman trying to make me look smart, calling this a commentary. When it’s really immature shit talking. Go Tebow and the broncos. And I know you got me picking anybody that beats on the Cow-Girls! They are pansy asses!

      • You have made immature shit talking into – an art form? A new genre? Something anyways. Nobody does it like you. Que music and ….. oh yeah the Cow Girls are Pansy Asses (in a sing song nanny nanny boo boo voice) I had to get in one more shot

  5. I saw the football picture and went blank. I’m sure you’d do the same thing if you saw a picture of buttons or something… 😉

  6. Pete, I don’t have the sports gene ( i just watch the games because I so appreciate the huddles), but this was my breakfast read. Burned off all my calories laughing.

    • Yes my dear. I know I don’t have a lot of sports fans here, that’s why I don’t use a lot of footballease and I breakitdown short and sweet. And why is it that all you fine ass women are always working out and counting calories. Don’t you know most men like a little junk in the trunk.

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